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Author Notes:

lirvilas 10th Jun 2020, 11:01 PM edit delete
lirvilas
dementia or abysmal judgement?

you decide
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Comments:

Phoenix In Crisis 11th Jun 2020, 4:01 AM edit delete reply
Phoenix In Crisis
At this point, Donna's just waiting for Freddy Kreuger to murder her and get it over with so this nightmare can finally end!
lirvilas 11th Jun 2020, 3:22 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
Next week: the blood

For real this time!
Sinch 13th Jun 2020, 3:10 PM edit delete reply
Meaning: "Donna, guess what? I've stopped having periods! Isn't it great?"
lirvilas 15th Jun 2020, 9:23 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
ha ha ha ha ha

not to spoil anything, but that's not off the table.

gotta get through this heinous "current events" chapter first
Mrremoraman 11th Jun 2020, 6:31 AM edit delete reply
Mrremoraman
Daddy's thinking ahead!
lirvilas 11th Jun 2020, 3:21 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
He’s often disturbingly lucid!
Mrremoraman 11th Jun 2020, 3:26 PM edit delete reply
Mrremoraman
Make her do a chug-spray during the reception
Ariane Eldar 11th Jun 2020, 8:25 AM edit delete reply
Ariane Eldar
Pffffft, Dona what's wrong?! Some of my friends are strippers, so what. Would you prefer a tax auditor as stepmom?
lirvilas 11th Jun 2020, 3:23 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
Don could probably do with some sound financial advice. Also: the cover doesn’t always describe the book!
Mrremoraman 11th Jun 2020, 3:27 PM edit delete reply
Mrremoraman
Pffffft. I'd rather have a prostitute or a porn star for a step mom than ANYBODY working for the IRS.
Smith 11th Jun 2020, 8:59 AM edit delete reply
Is the hot Donna maybe jealous of Naomi?
lirvilas 11th Jun 2020, 10:03 AM edit delete reply
lirvilas
On some level, yes.

Naomi is a constant reminder of a path not traveled.

Also it would be a lie to say there aren’t some major daddy issues here!
Microraptor 11th Jun 2020, 12:45 PM edit delete reply
Microraptor
Wait, wasn't Donna's mum a stripper too?
In this case, she's being rather hypocritical here...
lirvilas 14th Jun 2020, 8:08 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
Very hypocritical!
Kev 11th Jun 2020, 8:47 PM edit delete reply
Kev
Ok, this legit made me laugh out loud. It’s like a dirty dad joke. :D
lirvilas 13th Jun 2020, 4:48 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
takes one to write one

thanks!
Candralar 13th Jun 2020, 12:12 AM edit delete reply
Candralar
Dementia or Abysmal Judgment?

I'm going with his thought process (whatever's left of it) being - "Fuck it! I'm going out with a bang!" (or as many bangs as he's got left in him)
lirvilas 13th Jun 2020, 4:50 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
math is a helluva thing to bring into a relationship

also, if you had to choose between losing your mind or your... other abilities

that would be a tough decision
WandererX 14th Jun 2020, 8:34 AM edit delete reply
A stripper, with a smoking body, that wants to marry me and do OnlyFans in between epic cocaine-and-viagra fueled bouts of monkey sex *with me*?

Explain to me the downside. Please.
lirvilas 14th Jun 2020, 9:48 AM edit delete reply
lirvilas
yeah, on further reflection perhaps Donna should've gone with the "she's a Gold Digger just like your last wife!" line instead.
BeenThereDoneThat 14th Jun 2020, 5:47 PM edit delete reply
I have two pieces of advice to offer young people that I have learned during my life.

1) The best way to stop smoking is to never start.
2) Never marry a stripper.

That's my Vonnegut moment.
lirvilas 14th Jun 2020, 8:08 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
ha ha ha ha ha ha

Oh, I'm sorry, I shouldn't be laughing about any of this, but I'm always amazed at how the most ridiculous page I can make has invariably been lived by someone in the audience.

Thanks for sharing your two bits of advice... somewhere, right now, some damn kid is disregarding both of those.
lirvilas 15th Jun 2020, 9:09 PM edit delete reply
lirvilas
...and to add on to my previous comment, that damn kid is probably a Lance Corporal in the Corps

yeah I said it
NeilKapit 21st Jun 2020, 12:51 AM edit delete reply
NeilKapit
Factually accurate
mightguy15 27th Jun 2020, 2:31 PM edit delete reply
mightguy15
Well that's a checkmate is I've ever seen one